Tag Archives: HHT

Happy New September

I’ve bought a new diary and planner. Does anyone else start their year in September rather than January?

You’d think after 10 years I’d be much better at this blogging lark, but low and behold! It’s been another 5 months since I last put digital pen to digital paper. It’s been a busy one and yet another emotional rollercoaster. Buckle up, we’re gonna recap!

In March I was due to have a fourth diathermy laser treatment for my HHT. If you’re new to the blog, you can read all about my superhuman ability to bleed from my nose and mouth at any given moment, here.

I had recently had covid, again you can read about that particular shit show here. And despite knowing this and the fact my PCR test showed positive, I was invited onto the theatre ward. I turned up, mentally and physically prepared for another general anesthetic, only to be told it was a non-starter. It’s difficult all this surgery stuff.

I have to make sure I have adequate time off work. I have to make sure the kids are looked after for a couple of days because the operation wipes me out for a good 48 hours. I have to make sure my mental health is ready to deal with the fact this particular surgery holds very little hope of being 100% successful. To have all of that in order and then be held in a corridor like a leper was pretty crap, to say the least.

My mental health bounced. I lost confidence in my work, having to turn my camera off during meetings all the time, and beginning to feel myself pull away from wanting to go out and do stuff that usually makes me happy.

I referred myself to Talk Liverpool and after a 7-week wait, I was able to access a bunch of online modules to help me improve my mental health and wellbeing. I found some of the coping mechanisms relatively helpful but I really needed to talk to someone. Sadly, this didn’t happen, other than one phone call in which I was told I was ‘showing improvement’ and therefore referred back to my GP. I felt a bit bamboozled by it all really and not at all ‘improved’.

In May I buggered off to Portugal for four days R&R. I only had one nosebleed during that time which is hella surprising (aeroplane aircon, humidity, increased alcohol intake etc) and so I looked at villas and realised very quickly that I had no option but to return home. Damn it!

July was a whirlwind. I started a new job, my boy turned 8 and my mum flew us to Spain for a 14-day family endurance test, I mean holiday!

I’ve never been to mainland Spain in August before. This one warrants it’s own blog post. Sit tight for ‘Benidorm Bitches’ in the coming days.

I’ve had the fourth diathermy laser surgery. It didn’t go well. I came around in recovery and suffered 4-days worth of ‘ocular distortion’. Apparently, this occurs when you don’t fully close your eyes during a GA. On top of not being able to see straight, my nose was back to bleeding again as before, just four days post-surgery.

I’m currently awaiting a clinic review appointment and I can’t lie, I feel really down about it all. I’m back to daily journalling and trying to find a little joy in each day to keep my spirits up.

So here I am. My nose is still goosed, my vascular system is constantly trying to make my life more difficult and I SERIOUSLY need to lose some weight.

On the positive side – my bloody brilliant daughter smashed her GCSE’s and has already started her A Level programme. My middle wonder got a full bill of health in her recent HHT clinic, won a local and national art competition, and has become a fantastic little swimmer. What about the boy wonder I hear you cry? Well, he continues to amaze us all. He learned how to play chess in about 8 minutes flat, has learned how to swim (forward roll, backward roll and handstand in the pool) this summer AND he has enjoyed his first visit to Liverpool PRIDE.

This is what keeps you going, isn’t it? The little things. The smiles, and hugs and daft kitchen dances and good news and seeing friends and family and date nights and lovely dinners and hobnobs and coffee in bed on weekend mornings.

September is the start of a new academic year and for me a chance to renew the promises I made to myself in January. If you’ve any advice or great hacks for staying positive, being more disciplined or limiting those crappy times to maybe just an hour, or half a day when it all seems overwhelming, hit me up on the contact page.

Here’s to ‘keeping on’. Happy New Year.

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Decade

I’m celebrating 10 years of blogging with Covid and a 4,500 word giveaway. What a mash up!

I received an email from WordPress today which stated it’s my 10 year blog anniversary. My first thought was how different I am to the person I was a decade ago. Unrecognisable sums it up. 2012 I was a newly wed with 7 year-old and 6 month-old daughters and struggling with post natal depression. Life as a RAF wife never suited me. Too isolated. I turned to blogging as an escape from life behind the MoD wire, documenting thoughts, routines, aspirations.

Typing away in Costa like all the cool 2012 bloggers.

Fast forward 10 years and isolation is back – only this time it’s thanks to a positive Covid test this morning. It’s been a transformative decade. I took my blogging to college and earned my NCTJ Journalism qualification, enjoyed a freelance career covering all manner of phenomenal events and experiences and added a little boy to my brood. I also shed a husband, moved 160 miles across the country back to Liverpool, was diagnosed with an incurable disease (and dyspraxia) and landed my dream job in the Premier League. It’s been a ride.

Above all else, I still love to write. This morning I joined an online BIPC online seminar hosted by my former boss and good friend, Jo Austin, to brush up on my analytics skills – all the while taking page after page of notes. My 61 item online Asda food shop was handwritten before being typed in on the website and a whole slew of birthday and celebration cards have been decorated with my distinctive scrawl today, just to pass the time.

Even something simple like formulating a short quote on Instagram for a fantastic self-employed friend of mine (go get ’em, Carmel) is a thrill. Proof reading homework, commenting in reading records and typing up epistaxis severity scores every day makes my soul happy.

I’m reading more in 2022. I’ve managed 13 books so far, the most recent being ‘In A House Of Lies’ by Ian Rankin, another of his TV famous Rebus series. I love the challenge of switching authors in quick succession, it’s a great lesson in writing style. Join the 2022 book challenge here.

My blogging set up has not changed in 10 years

As part of my ‘100 books in 2022’ challenge I listened to ‘Windswept & Interesting’ narrated by the author himself, the big yin, Billy Connolly on Audible. Still one of my favourite comedians and story tellers since watching him on TV in the 80’s cavorting across the stage, my mum and dad in pleats laughing. I’m always inspired by the desire to make people laugh and the level of commitment it requires. Reading is integral to writing. You can’t do one without the other. Something I obviously wasn’t wise to when I started out blogging.

The level of cringe in my early blog posts is enough to have you crying with laughter (or physical pain) I’m sure. So with my sights set firmly on the future (and not past blog posts such as ‘Is Anyone Out There’ and ‘Geordie’s Round Up), I’m setting a new goal for my writing.

THE GIVEAWAY BIT

To celebrate a decade of writing I’m giving away 10 custom blog posts/articles up to 450 words each for copyright free publication. If your business website could benefit from some fresh new copy or you want to mix up your own blog with a guest post, interview or feature, get involved. Similarly, I love a bit of creative fiction too. If you fancy being the main character in a super short story, I can make that happen! Forgot to write your best man’s speech? Need a snappy intro for your thesis? Challenge accepted!

The first ten people to email katereillyjames@gmail.com with contact details and a line or two about how you want to use the 450 words – wins! It’s that simple. All articles will be organised via email/phone/Zoom and entries are open NOW and until 30th April 2022. Strictly one entry per person/organisation. SME/Sole traders only and no redrafts.

Here’s to words. Old, new, fascinating and familiar.

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6 Weekend Things

I do love a good listicle and they say sharing is caring. No idea who ‘they’ are but let’s dive in, shall we?

The weekend is but a moment away and as I count down to packing my kids off for a weekend with their dad, fold and put away the last of the laundry and log off my work computer, I think about writing another list of things to pack into the two day work break. It’s easy to see why life feels like a bit of a merry-go-round at times.

This list is fun, no really, and it matters not an iota if I don’t tick off a single item by Sunday evening. It’s a list of opportunity rather than responsibility. There’s a bit of everything. Chill, fresh air, creative pursuits, baking and organised chaos!

1 – Invisible Women, Caroline Criado Perez

I ordered Invisible Women by Caroline Criado Perez after a recommendation from a colleague. I’m preparing to interview a doctor next week and my colleague suggested I read up on the gender disparity and inequality in the health care industry as detailed in the book. Technically this is preparation work, but I already know it’s going to ignite something in me to read more, and that totally counts as personal development. I’m always looking for book recommendations, if you’ve got one to share (or ten, no one ever has just one book recommendation) drop me a line katereillyjames@gmail.com

2 – Mad Men

Alright, I know I’m like 15 years late to the party, but I’ve just started watching Mad Men season 1 on Amazon Prime and i’m totally hooked. I’ll get at least two episodes in this weekend. I’m outraged by the every day sexism, the misogyny, the double standards, and yet I can’t help but admire Don Draper, played expertly by Jon Hamm. The fashion, the dialect and the early 60’s aesthetic, plus everyone smoking all the damn time. I’m 6 episodes in and I’ve committed to the long haul. Can’t stand Mr Campbell and adore Joan Holloway. Dying to know what’s wrong with Betty’s hands? And how cute is a teeny Kiernan Shipka as their daughter? Wait til they find out she grows up to be a witch!

3 – Ebay

Urgh, it’s that time again. I routinely do an Ebay selling haul twice a year and while the app now makes it much easier to list your items, it’s still a pain in the ass. To spice things up this time, I’m also clearing out my boyfriends wardrobe to add to the massive bin bag collection waiting patiently in the spare room. i’m told Sunday, early evening is the best time to list as buyers are more likely to have time to bid and see an auction through to the end, hopefully encouraging a last minute flurry of offers. This task alone will likely wipe out Sunday, but it’ll be worth it for the money – honest! Zara dress BNWT for £5 anyone?

4 – Urban Graffiti

I’ll be back at Springfield Park, Knotty Ash at 6am on Saturday (because I’m a complete weirdo who can’t lie in, especially if the weather is dry, no chance) to chalk the pathways for the local children and those visiting Alder Hey Children’s Hospital. I’ve created some fun playground games on the paths a number of times previously and as it’s set to rain on Saturday afternoon/evening, these modern hopscotch will vanish ready for the next ones. This also counts as mini yoga/pilates once I’m done weaving my way along the paths. I’m shattered afterwards.

5 – Community Spirit

I’m loving having a couple of creative tasks to get on with this weekend. Secondly, i’m breaking out the sewing machine to make a start on some bunting for our local foodbank, The Drive. We’re having a crack at the ‘In Bloom’ competition this year and determined to spruce up a triangle of wasteland/grass into something for all the community to enjoy. I’ll be making giant floor cushions, picnic blankets and bunting to brighten up the planters and railings. Pass me the pinking shears!

6 – Pumping Iron

My HHT has been pretty bad this week. I’ve had a nose bleed every day including 4 whoppers on Monday which saw me calling into work sick and dizzy on Tuesday morning. My lovely colleagues suggested I try dates as a healthy iron supplement. So my plan is to have a go at making date flapjacks to munch on throughout the week as they keep really well. Thanks to Sabah and Nikki for the heads up. I’ll bet they taste a million times better than plain old iron supplements. Yuck. If you’ve never heard of HHT before and wonder what it’s like to sporadically bleed like you’ve been punched in the face, head this way to learn more.

What are you up to this weekend?

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10 Things I Can’t Do

….without having a nosebleed.

I have HHT. I’ve written about it a few times previously, but if you need to catch up, head this way first. I have daily nosebleeds. Sometimes it’s just a 5 or ten second trickle. Sometimes it’s 40 mins in my boyfriends bathroom and it’s exploded all over the sink, the tiles, the floor and me. The gift that keeps on giving.

Lots of people have nosebleeds. I get them because HHT causes my blood vessels to form improperly. They’re a big old tangled mess. It’s a hereditary condition and my dad, brother and two daughters have it too. Needless to say, we go through a whole load of toilet roll in our house.

HHT is a royal pain in the arse. When it’s not causing life threatening symptoms, such a liver failure, stroke and pulmonary issues, HHT likes to find an outlet to bleed like hell, without any warning. I’m a fan of sharing just how frequent and severe my bleeds are on my social media. I believe it helps to raise awareness of the disease, which in the UK is massively underrepresented.

Filtered pics and trigger warnings aside. My HHT gets me down a fair bit. A fellow HHT sufferer posted in a Facebook group that she’d lost a loved one to HHT over the festive period. If that wasn’t bad enough, her state of heightened emotions meant she’d suffered horrendous bleeds of her own, every day since. It’s hard going.

While there is no cure and treatment is still very much in the developmental stages for HHT, having each other is the best medicine right now. People who understand what living with a potential ticking time bomb disease feels like. It’s not great, but an understanding ear and virtual hug means the world.

Sharing tips on how to stem bleeds quickly (tampons up your nose – winner) or what questions to ask your ENT, vascular or genomics specialist (can I see what you just pulled out of my nose please?) and the odd message of support, it’s all we’ve got.

I want to share some things with you that I can’t do. My HHT dictates what’s good on a daily basis. Some days I can ride my bike to work. Some days I can ride my bike to work but I arrive looking like I’ve been involved in a road traffic accident, covered in blood. You get the idea.

Debilitating is the word I’d most associate with HHT. Frustrating is a close second. Here’s why.

Ten things I can’t do without having a nosebleed.

1 – Blow my nose. Nope, don’t even thing about it. Guaranteed a double nostril downpour, for sure.

2 – Sleep on my right side. After multiple laser surgeries, my right nostril is now weaker than the left. If I lay on my right during the night, the pressure builds in my nose and it’ll pour all over my pillow and bedding.

3 – Take a hot shower. Yep, hot water and my nose simply do not mix! Team lukewarm over here!

4 – Blend foundation or concealer on my nose. Nah, red, blotchy and interesting it is. Not worth the risk.

5 – Sauna or steam room. Again, nope. Is that my temperature creeping up? Incoming nosebleed it is then.

6 – Bend/lean over. This sounds utterly mad, but even if I so much as lean off the sofa for the remote, my nose is going to go.

7 – Rush. This one is particularly troublesome because I’m not exactly the most organised person. The morning school run, in the rain, laden down with bags and flutes and pe kits and lunch bags has resulted in many a HHT fail. I think our school friends are used to seeing me covered in blood these days.

8 – I’m going to say it. Sex. I’ve bled on my other half a couple of times at the worst possible time. It’s not a consistent problem but it’s not exactly great. Luckily he’s awesome about it.

9 – Strain. Again, ewww but true. I know that anything that builds pressure will result in a bleed. I’ve got a lot of love for leafy greens and less awkward chats with my consultant about toilet habits!

10 – Brush my teeth. I do it twice a day, so obviously I run the risk of two bleeds each day. Which then makes me feel sick and light headed. Plus, if my nose bleeds into my mouth, or my lips or tongue bleed, then yes, you guessed it, I have to brush my teeth again. Such fun.

So there you go. A little insight into the daft but annoying as hell limitations of having a vascular disease. If you’d like to find out more about HHT, head to www.curehht.org.

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What The World Thinks I Do

Did you see that series of memes that did the rounds a few years back? You know, the ones that used 6 images to portray how different groups in society view your job/vocation? Like this one….

I mean, it’s not far off the truth.

I quite like this one. I think it’s a fair and accurate representation of life as a journalist from all perspectives. Especially the last one.

In 2018 I was thrown a serious curve ball. No longer ‘just’ a journalist working the entertainment and lifestyle desk. In August 2018 I became a paediatric vascular disease patient expert – almost overnight.

Putting all my investigative journalistic skills to good use, I spent night after night on the small hospital sofa reading research papers in Danish, Zooming Italian vascular patients and their families, and dissecting x-ray, MRI and CT scan results in the early hours, at the nurses station.

Legends

What I discovered shook me to the core. My daughter’s have an incurable hereditary disease that may or may not result in premature death. In the states they call this disease ‘the silent killer’. Some people have symptoms, some don’t. Some have strokes, liver failure and blood clots, some don’t. It’s a luck of the draw type situation.

I’m not one for sensationalism. Okay, I totally am, (I studied sports journalism, of course I love sensationalism), but I was far more taken with the research, how the disease has brought about pioneering medical and surgical interventions and of course, what trials and potential cures my girls’ could benefit from in their life times.

As a journalist, I write stories. I listen to people, I research, I ask annoying questions. I also photograph and record things. I relay facts and figures and sometimes I write a punchy headline or two.

As a HHT Mum, I wipe up a hell of a lot of blood, sometimes on a daily basis. I pick up nose plugs that have fallen out during night bleeds. I prepare my eldest daughter 48 hours in advance of a blood test, which involves a barrage of text messages, ensuring she eats and hydrates on approach, providing snacks for when she comes round, on the floor/in the phlebotomy chair – when it all gets too much.

I hold and squeeze hands and use brute strength to keep her in the chair until the nurse draws the blood she needs to adequately monitor the situation. I wipe tears, mop brows, carry coats and school blazers, wringing with sweat. I provide her with bottles of Oasis for a sugar rush, post blood test. I offer tissues for the inevitable nose bleed which accompanies any stressful situation.

I take calls from school when her blood pressure or iron levels have bottomed out and she faints. Usually in biology. I encourage vitamin intake, sometimes I raise my voice to get the job done. I reassure. I tell white lies. Necessary white lies. I move work and school to accommodate clinic appointments. I ask more questions. Constant questions. Sometimes I panic.

Everything is fine

I am resigned to never having white bed linen or soft furnishings, or clothes. I walk a little slower when she gets chest pains on the school run. I take pictures of her lung scars to show her how well it is healing, two years post surgery. I ask how PE went this week, any pain? I check up on blood results, oxygen saturation levels and chase clinic appointments. I talk to other HHT patients around the globe. I beg my own HHT surgeon not to retire, and swat up on the latest potential paediatric clinical trials. I educate others.

I’ve found a role you can’t roll into six humorous images. It’s almost a shame. If there were more awareness and chat about HHT, maybe I could make it more fun. For now, it’s back to the nurses station at 3 am, armed with more Garibaldi biscuits and a stack of lung x-rays.

Find out more about HHT, here.

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Saturday Catch Up

Feeling a bit paranoid this morning. I woke up with a smidge of a sore throat and it’s making me anxious. Can’t help but think it’s due to the tonne of alcohol I necked last night though.

Before anyone worries, I’ve no temperature or cough so I’ve come to work, where I toil on my own for a few hours so I’m also staying safe and not endangering others.

Waiting to get in at work

Tell you what though, four months on, it’s still really scary all this COVID shiz, isn’t it? I try to limit my COVID media consumption otherwise I end up feeling panicky and like I don’t want to let my kids breathe fresh air or see daylight again.

I’m slightly more concerned at present as I’m due to have surgery in a few weeks and the thought of going into hospital, plus the self-isolating period beforehand is making me a little nervous. I’m sure it’ll be fine. I have to take a COVID test four days before the procedure to make sure I’m in tip-top condition, so that’s a weight off.

It’s disappointing to see so many people STILL not wearing masks in my local area. Both Tesco and Aldi seemed to have relaxed their measures. There’s no longer staff on the door encouraging people to mask up and sanitise their hands. People are back to moving your trolley or leaning over you for produce. Again, maybe I’m a bit paranoid but surely it’s better to be safe than sorry?

Just wear a mask, will yer!

I also understand that not everyone can wear a mask, but I doubt very much that accounts for the many I’ve witnessed.

So back to Saturday morning. I’m currently sat outside work waiting for someone to let me in as I’m not a key holder. It’s BOILING out. 19 degrees and cloudy at 7am can take a running joke. Speaking of which, I text my boyfriend last night (after a few glasses of wine) and said: “ isn’t it brilliant sleeping alone when it’s hot”. I’m not sure what he made of that but I think it made some sense.

I woke up this morning with the youngest night ninja sprawled out across my side of my bed!! I don’t know how he does it! My subconscious picks up every moment they turn over on the night so I’ve no idea how he sneaks in. Little beggar.

He read me the ‘Mummy and Me’ forever friends book this morning then proceeded to make me a slice of wholemeal bread, slathered with Philadelphia, for breakfast. He’s gonna make a smashing husband one day, that kid.

Full up with love, I cycled the 2 miles into work and have been sat, sweating on the steps outside waiting to get in ever since. Happy Saturday peeps!

Thunder & Lightning Ice Cream is the one

Prepare for a barrage of blog posts in the next week as a number of art commissions I’ve been working on, officially go public. Plus I’m yet to bore you all with my Scotland trip photos and anecdotes. Nice one Julia!

 

 

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HHT Kids

This is not just another blog post about HHT. This is the M&S blog post of HHT because things are about to change. Here come the kids! 

July 2020 has been transformative. For 2 years we, as a family have come to terms with a staggering diagnosis. HHT is an incurable, hereditary disease, which can be fatal. Having a personal diagnosis can be very frightening. Having two of your three children, your dad and your brother also diagnosed, all in one go, is off the scale.

You can read our full HHT story here.

It’s time to make a change. HHT is not widely recognised nor represented in the UK. There are no specialist treatment centres and trying to get your hands on up to date advice, let alone treatment, can take months and months.

Here’s what I’m going to do.

What

I’m going to launch HHT Kids. Primarily a website, HHT Kids will become the go-to platform for children, young people, and their families looking to access quality, medical-backed information, support, and a sense of belonging.

How

Having already established connections with HHT Italy, HHT Ireland, Cure HHT, Alder Hey Children’s Hospital, Great Ormond Street Hospital, and Boston Children’s Hospital VAC Centre, I will curate factual, medical-approved information and guidance for free digital access.

The website will offer information about the diagnosis and treatment of the condition in multiple formats. I would like to see walk and talk videos from clinicians to show children and their families what happens when they go to an HHT appointment/Genomics/MRI Imaging/ Phlebotomy etc.

The website will also feature case studies. Kids, writing, or creating unique art to illustrate their HHT symptoms, in their own way.

The website will feature important information packs for parents, caregivers, schools, nurseries, and community groups. This information will help those outside the family bubble to understand the HHT diagnosis and coping mechanisms.

The website will feature additional information which HHT sufferers can personalise to help others understand how they cope with their symptoms. ‘My Friend Has HHT’ and easy to complete, downloadable school packs, which families can pass on to school, will prove to be invaluable.

The website will offer practical advice from people with HHT. Tips on how to pack for travelling, competing in sports, what happens if your nose bleeds in the middle of an exam/at the cinema/while swimming, etc.

Developing relationships with amazing artists has enabled me to begin planning different ways of reaching young people with HHT. Thanks to Andy Reilly, Brian Denham, and Wedge Collective, together I am positive we can actively engage HHT patients with art therapy, creative challenges, and printed deliverables.

This will be the first initiative to acknowledge how important positive mental health can aid HHT daily life.

The HHT Kids website will feature a blog where users will be encouraged to contribute, along with updates from our amazing partners in medicine and genomics and our European partners.

There are no specialist centres in the UK. This isn’t a national charity nor is there any real understanding among health care professionals outside ENT or vascular departments.

There is currently no cure for HHT. I firmly believe it is vital the voices of HHT children and young people are heard and they are actively engaged with education and research which could ultimately save lives.

The wheels are in motion. Follow @hht_kids on Instagram to find out more. If you’d like to be involved with the project, please email: katereillyjames@gmail.com 

 

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Crocs, Geese, and Giant Strawberries

There are fundamental signs of getting old, and choosing to buy a pair of Crocs is undeniably one of them. It’s official, I am middle-aged. Shouldn’t I be buying a sports car and dating a 22-year-old?

Alright, so the old adage of suffering a mid-life crisis is a bit outdated, but seriously, I want my PORSCHE 911! I’m joking, although I have bagged a younger man, but that’s not news.

The weather during lockdown has been nuts. 30 degrees one day followed by 8 days of solid rain, followed by a week of mid-twenties and 40 days and 40 nights of rain again. Like I said, nuts. I wasn’t prepared for summer.

I panicked. I didn’t know what I was doing, I just knew I didn’t want to wreck another pair of Adidas Campus by wearing them without socks, to avoid tan lines and before I knew it I was on the Very website looking at flip flops and then didn’t stock my size in Havaianas and then after three hours of scrolling for stupid flip flops, I just went for plain black, hit order and logged out.

I wasn’t even excited when they arrived. I opened the bag and there, staring back at me, were Crocs. Not Crocs like, Crocs. They’re not mules that you slip your feet into. They don’t have air holes in the front, nor a strap that goes around the heel. They don’t have Crocs written anywhere on them bar the sole, and they don’t have the logo. Oh God, I bought Crocs, didn’t I? Shit.

The weather stayed warm and so I wore them, making sure to hide them from my teen in case she started legal proceedings against me. It’s been three weeks and so far, so good. Having published this, I won’t be surprised to find my secret Crocs have been kidnapped like in some summer sandal version of Taken. I can’t see Liam Neeson turning up to rescue my flip flops. Can you?

From crocs to geese! Yesterday I wrote about The Untitled Goose Game on Nintendo Switch and oh my days, it’s so addictive! The other worrying aspect of this game is realising that acting like a complete asshat is actually really fun! Scaring a kid into a phone box by honking at him, stealing household items from the shop, lobbing a pint glass in the canal, and smashing valuable vases is a riot! Anyone else played it yet? What do you think?

Where do the Giant Strawberries fit into all this, you may be wondering. It’s simple really. I managed to get a shed load of work done today, loads of research, I’ve started making more progress on HHT Kids too. Funding, set up, content creation, talking to our website designers, getting the ball rolling with organisation status, etc. I’ve cooked, cleaned, emailed, called, text, typed, and listened. All-day long. (Still no strawberries?!)

At 5:30pm we packed up some snacks and headed out to a new park for an alfresco dinner and some exercise. I met the cutest dog, annoyed my boyfriend by calling him for no good reason, took loads of photographs, hid my little boy as he took a quick leak in the bushes, and cycled home. Bit of TV and everyone into bed.

Here I am, trying to not rustle the packet of Giant Strawberries I told the kids must have ‘fallen out of the bag at the park’ so I don’t have to share them. The old ones are the best!

 

 

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Summer Loving

It’s officially July. This makes me happy for many reasons. A fresh start on my Everton calendar (oh hi Tom & Dom), a fresh start in my diary and it feels like summer again, which to me, means great music and good times. 

I’ve just updated the Mixtape section of the blog with 31 of my favourite tunes for the month ahead. As usual, it’s a real mixed bag in there. Everything from Beyonce to Al Green, Doves, Nick Ellis, Sinead Harnett, Earth Wind and Fire, and the King himself. Give it a listen here and send over any new music recommendations to katereillyjames@gmail.com.

Elsewhere, it’s set to be a busy month. I’ve just had a second art commission confirmed, which I’m mega excited about, more on that soon. Having just gotten into the swing of things in my new job, I’m finding managing working from home difficult.

The kids are home all day and crave structure and while I’m learning all kinds of medical terminology and working out marketing strategy, they’ve been spending way too much time on their ipads. Back to homeschool planning and prep for me!

We discovered the most awesome Nintendo Switch game earlier today. Untitled Goose Game is bloody hilarious. You play a goose, let loose on a local village and the aim of the game is to be as annoying as possible at all times.

There’s a dedicated honk button and your to-do list consists of tasks such as ‘grab a pint glass and chuck it in the canal’ or ‘lock the little boy in the phone booth’. Honestly, I’ve howled laughing playing it with my very impressionable 5-year-old. I was slightly mortified when he asked me what a phone booth is?! God, I’m so old. Check out Untitled Goose Game here.

Absolutely chuffed for the Toffees today (COYB!) and a home 2-1 win against Leicester and our first penalty of the season, at Goodison. Still not loving the fake crowd noise but a win is a win! Bring on Spurs on Monday.

Had white chocolate Coco Pops for dinner (thanks again to @Kelloggs for the fab nutrition advice for HHT patients) while emailing the European co-chair of the VASCERN HHT group for some advice about setting up HHT Kids on Instagram. If you don’t already know my HHT story and why it’s so important to me to raise awareness of this rare, vascular disease, you can get the low down here.

So after a 3 mile, 9pm walk with the little ones, I’ve blitzed the house, prepped homeschool for tomorrow (for me and them), and flopped into bed to get my first blog of July done – only to realise it’s already the 2nd…bugger!

Happy July Everyone, hope it’s a cracker for you.

 

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HHT & Me

Imagine being on the train or bus en route to work, or in the office on the phone to a client, or live on the radio chatting about topical news stories, or watching your kid’s christmas play, or on a date, or simply just walking down the road….and your nose explodes with blood.

Imagine this happens 4 or 5 times a day, with absolutely no warning. This is just the start of life with HHT. 

Ossler-Weber Rendue Syndrome or HHT (Hereditary Haemorrhagic Telangectasia) is a genetic vascular disorder in which blood vessels form abnormally, this can cause serious bleeding. The abnormal vessels can be seen on the skin as red, sometimes purple spots. If a bleed occurs in a major organ, just as the liver, lungs or brain, it could result in life changing consequences.

You’ve probably guessed from the term hereditary, that I’ve had HHT all my life. I went through school having nose bleeds (epistaxis) all the damn time. Like, most days. My Dad and my brother were the same. Waking up to find my pillow case covered in blood was completely normal from the age of 10.

I loved sport, but often found myself on the side line with a wad of tissue shoved up my nostril. My poor dad could barely get in the shower each morning without his nose kicking off a stream of blood all over the towels and play fighting with my brother was guaranteed to have us fighting to get to the bathroom for toilet roll before too long.

My parents said we had ‘weak noses’ and seeing as we had never complained of any other, serious ailments, we just got on with it. We never had any notion of these symptoms being something much more dangerous.

Cut to May Half Term, 2018. I’m a mum of three. Two girls aged 12 and 6 and a little dude age 3. It’s Thursday, early evening. We’re having dinner and my 6 year old comes to me and says mum I don’t feel very well. A split second later she throws up handfuls of blood clots, and once she starts, they just keep coming. If you’ve ever seen the cherry-pip scene in The Witches of Eastwick, you’ll get the idea.

I call my mum to come and watch the other two kids and race the 6 year old to the children’s hospital, which thankfully, is just 5 minutes up the road.

4 hours later, the A&E staff still cant work out what’s wrong with her and why her oxygen saturations are at 83. She’s tired by smiling. Drinking and fully responsive. She has a seated chest x ray and we’re admitted to a ward.

In March 2018 I had taken her to the same A&E after 5 days of high temperature, when she went listless and her lips turned blue. After an x ray, she was diagnosed with influenza, admitted and then discharged with Tamiflu. Within 4 days she was right as rain and back at school.

Cut back to May 2018 and the chest x ray results came back. What had shown as a 50p sized area of inflammation in March, had grown to more than triple the size by May, and it was making my girl very, very poorly.

The respiratory team suspected tuberculosis and she was put into quarantine. I was sleeping on the sofa next to her every night over the bank holiday weekend. She was send for other observations but there was no definite diagnosis.

The Tuesday was a hot day. The tiny hospital room windows only opened a fraction and we were desperate for fresh air as well as news. Our respiratory consultant introduced us to Professor Calum Semple, a child health and out-break medicine specialist. Professor Semple came into the room, introduced himself, asked my daughter how she was feeling and what had happened. He examined her and then he asked me if I’d ever had nosebleeds and for how long I’d had the red spots on my hands and chest.

35 years worth of jigsaw pieces fell into place in just a few moments as Professor Semple explained what HHT is and how sure he felt my daughter, and likely me and other members of our family also had the disorder. Unfortunately for her, an abnormal vessel had formed in the lower chamber of her right lung and it wasn’t possible to stem/remove it.

A number of further tests were performed, a prescription for tranexamic acid was issued and a surgery date set for August 2018. Genetics were also informed and my eldest daughter and son were to have blood tests to see if they too were carriers. My eldest girl tested positive, my son is negative.

My middle daughter had a lobectomy on 21st August 2018 and despite a suggested 6 day stay in hospital, was home in just two. She’s made a full recovery and was even back at swimming lessons by January 2019.

The scary thing about HHT is that there is no cure. The bleeds can be as light as a nose trickle or life-changing AVM’s (arteriovenous malformations) in a major organ leading to stroke, organ failure, seizures, anaemia, an increased risk of major bleed in pregnancy and more.

There’s also a chance that absolutely none of these issues may arise, and you go through life without any HHT issues. The ‘ticking time bomb’ feeling however is having an adverse effect on my mental health since my daughter got sick. If it was just me, I could likely deal with that. But now we know my dad, my brother and my two daughters are all HHT carriers, I’m reminded every day that my loved ones are at risk.

The UK lags behind many other countries in terms of HHT awareness and treatment. I’m incredibly grateful for Professor Semple and the respiratory team at Alder Hey Children’s Hospital. A HHT clinic has now been established and my daughters are monitored regularly for changes in their health as well as offered additional treatments to try and aliviate the daily symptoms – ie. nosebleeds and fainting spells.

I am now a patient of an ENT specialist and have since had laser surgery on my nose in an attempt to stem the nosebleeds. Unfortunately it was just 18 days post-surgery before my symptoms returned to ‘normal’ and I was back wishing I’d bought shares in Andrex when I was a teen. I’m due a review any day now but due to Covid-19, there are many others waiting for an appointment too.

People who know me well, know I have nosebleeds at the most ridiculous of times. That list at the top of the article? All of those have happened to me on a regular basis. My worst bleeds last over an hour and leave me feeling tired and embarassed. Some have left me literally, covered in blood when I’ve not managed to catch the blood flow in time, one particular school-run sticks in my mind. All down the front of my coat and half my kids friends being too scared to come anywhere near me.

Christmas 2019 was particularly bad. My nose started at my boyfriends place. He knows about my HHT and I’ve managed to keep a lid on it for the most part. My nose erupted at his place, and I mean erupted. It was like an episode of Dexter in ther. Blood up the bathroom tiles, sink, floor, me!

After 45 mins sat on the floor and attempting to clean up, I managed to go sit on the bed. Only for the vein in my nose to blow a second time. Another half an hour later and I’d lost os much blood I was around 10 mins from heading to A&E for a blood transfusion when it slowed and finally stopped. I was so embarassed.

They happen every couple of months but it’s the lighter bleeds, which happen 4 to 5 times a day that get me down. The longest I’ve gone without a nosebleed, since my laser surgery in June 2019, is 5 days. 5 days of bliss. As I’ve gotten older my telangectasia (red/purple blood spots) have gotten prgressively worse and more noticeable. My tongue is covered in them and the ones on my face are much more obvious. My dad and brother both suffer the same frequency of bleeds and spots too.

My eldest daughter is 14 now and suffers with daily blood clots as well as bleeds. She’s had to sit out of lessons having fainted due to low blood pressure and anaemia. She’s embarassed about having to spit out blood clots, sometimes a number of days after her last nose bleed.

HHT is recognised as a rare diease, effecting 1 in 5,000 people. Many HHT patients go undiagnosed as nosebleeds can be quite common. Many HHT sufferers have AVM’s which cause no issues and HHT is very much a disorder which is acted upon when it presents problems. Reactionary rather than preventative and this frightens the life out of me.

There are on-going clinical trials for HHT in adults. Thalidomide has proven to be effective in reducing, and in some cases stopping nose bleeds (epistaxis) altogether. The Genomics team we’re working with have given us, as a family, incredible insights into genetic selection for the girls and if, in the future they want to have children of their own and not pass on the faulty HHT gene.

It was a genetic psychologist who, at an appointment to test my son for HHT, asked me for the first time, if I was okay. Having gone through a terrifying ordeal of seeing my 6 year old gravely ill and not knowing what was wrong. To discovering soon after that my loved ones are also at risk from the same dangers and then wondering what the hell I would do if it was me who got sick with an AVM. I had been running on auto-pilot for months.

It’s been two years since my daughter first got sick. It really is a case of every day as it comes and should HHT throw us in the deep end again, we’ll learn how to swim again. In the mean time I’m investigating what other treatments are proving to be effective and looking at research from other countries on how to combat the debilitating daily bleeding.

Of course I’m sat at my laptop writing this with a wad of kitchen roll up my left nostril while my eldest daughter is in the bathroom using up all the tissue for her own nose bleed. Just because we’ve normalised it at home, it doesn’t mean we, or more so, my girls should have to suffer with it.

If you or someone close to you has HHT and you’re based in the UK, I would really like to hear from you. Drop me an email Katereillyjames@gmail.com or find me on Twitter @Katereillyjames. 

You can find out more about HHT on the official NHS pages here. Also, the HHT UK Facebook group is a great place to get support and hear how other people and their loved ones are coping with HHT. Find out more here. 

 

 

 

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